mkderwish…

Edit : I received my actual semester 2 result transcript a couple of days ago. Alhamdulillah, I got 3.88. Please pray for my AP result, which will be released on the 3rd week of July… End of Edit

I’m back . Haha.. I cannot tahan anymore.. I need to write. I tried to be distant from this blog to avoid me writing complete craps.

I don’t want to feel depressed anymore. At least not showing it here.

I know no one cares. I’m not actually depressed. It’s just that everything was so overwhelming around me that I felt so serabut. And I needed a break, and I had it. I had my brain worked to find the way out. I know I’m lying. I just decided to be ‘cool’ about all these.

hmm.. but I sure did a lot of thinking…

I’m sorry, I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to tell what really are bothering me, as much as I want to… one thing though, there are lots… that explains my extreme serabut-ness. Some you can already guess (based on my entries before… ).

Anyway, my aunt went back to our hometown for a couple of days but came back here because she just cannot stays with a younger sister. She got worse, rebelled and got mad at everything. That’s why we took her back. It’s scary when she gets worse…

Hanaa’ is extremely cute! She can laugh now. So adorable!!! But just now she fell on the floor (my younger sis accidently let her go.. and now she’s still crying on and off. Poor her… But still is sooo cute!

My batch plans for a mini reunion this wednesday. Honestly, I don’t feel enthusiastic at all. My soul is not into it anymore. I am tired.

Our former school office clerk passed away yesterday. She had liver cancer and survived for more than 2 years after her diagnosis. Inna lillah wa inna ilaihi rojiun.. Her children are still schooling, all of them. As for me, I cannot think of the right words to comment on this… I feel sad.. Death again…

My grandfather is just hospitalized, he has lung cancer. He has alzheimer, that’s why he seems clueless about his illness. Maybe he doesn’t even feel pains. That’s good then. He won’t suffer so much.

One of my cousin is having major depression. The family is afraid that he might be developing Schizophrenia… It’s in our blood already.. very high possibility. Aaa!! I’m so scared.

Okay, I need to stop here…